Hello everyone,
After a year, I managed to get out of a relationship with a complicated guy and to pretty much move on (thanks, partly to the invaluable advice from some fantastic people on this forum.)
The guy in question was diagnosed an antisocial personality disorder with narcissistic traits, a topic Ive been reading about a lot to be able to understand what happened between us. The thing is, after breaking up with him the kindest possible way; I decided to go no contact, because its really the only possible way of moving on from such toxic personalities. Since then he has tried to contact me a few times, and I have ignored him every time, with all the pain of my heart.
Last week I received an email from him in which he said he was feeling worthless and wanted to end with his life. He wondered if I cared at all for him and said he didnt deserve to be blacked out this way from me. I am since then considering the possibility of writing a short mail just saying that of course I do care and will always do, but dont desire to have a friendly relationship with him. I just dont want him to feel like a piece of s***t, but at the same time I dont want to destroy my boundaries and lose the peace of mind I managed to conquer with so much effort. According all the books about his mental disorder, this attitude respond to a maneuver called hoovering which basically consist in getting others peoples attention through manipulation and get some narcissistic supply. I really dont know what to do, because no matter how toxic he is, he is still a human being and suffers when he thinks he is worthless. I wonder if theres a way to cheer him up without engaging further with him.
I asked: How should I react to his emails? And got 63.3.4 >17
Hexagram 63 seems to indicate Ive reached a point of no return in our relationship and I should focus more on moving on than on him. Line 3 could indicate that Im being tested and should persevere on my goal of no contact. Maybe line 4 indicates how quickly all my efforts could crumble if I dont remain on guard (??). Hexagram 17 seems related to non-action, but Im not sure.
Then I asked: should I reply to his mail? And got 47.1.5>54
Hex 47 is about not being reactive I dont know what the oppression must be referring to, and the lines are as confusing as the hexagram itself... Maybe they express my resistance to get completely out of the situation? I would appreciate some help to understand my casts. Thanks a lot!
After a year, I managed to get out of a relationship with a complicated guy and to pretty much move on (thanks, partly to the invaluable advice from some fantastic people on this forum.)
The guy in question was diagnosed an antisocial personality disorder with narcissistic traits, a topic Ive been reading about a lot to be able to understand what happened between us. The thing is, after breaking up with him the kindest possible way; I decided to go no contact, because its really the only possible way of moving on from such toxic personalities. Since then he has tried to contact me a few times, and I have ignored him every time, with all the pain of my heart.
Last week I received an email from him in which he said he was feeling worthless and wanted to end with his life. He wondered if I cared at all for him and said he didnt deserve to be blacked out this way from me. I am since then considering the possibility of writing a short mail just saying that of course I do care and will always do, but dont desire to have a friendly relationship with him. I just dont want him to feel like a piece of s***t, but at the same time I dont want to destroy my boundaries and lose the peace of mind I managed to conquer with so much effort. According all the books about his mental disorder, this attitude respond to a maneuver called hoovering which basically consist in getting others peoples attention through manipulation and get some narcissistic supply. I really dont know what to do, because no matter how toxic he is, he is still a human being and suffers when he thinks he is worthless. I wonder if theres a way to cheer him up without engaging further with him.
I asked: How should I react to his emails? And got 63.3.4 >17
Hexagram 63 seems to indicate Ive reached a point of no return in our relationship and I should focus more on moving on than on him. Line 3 could indicate that Im being tested and should persevere on my goal of no contact. Maybe line 4 indicates how quickly all my efforts could crumble if I dont remain on guard (??). Hexagram 17 seems related to non-action, but Im not sure.
Then I asked: should I reply to his mail? And got 47.1.5>54
Hex 47 is about not being reactive I dont know what the oppression must be referring to, and the lines are as confusing as the hexagram itself... Maybe they express my resistance to get completely out of the situation? I would appreciate some help to understand my casts. Thanks a lot!