A few days ago a cat I was caring for since several years ago passed away. The reason for his death has not been established but I have reasons to think it might have been (also or maybe even mostly) due to my negligence of his supposedly deteriorating state of health. I do not think I have a problem with accepting loss of close ones, more than that I rather dwell on alternative scenarios of what would have happened if or what could I have done differently to prevent the loss or rather appreciate the one lost more since I often feel I received more than I gave. I know that these two are generally connected and that endless dwelling on what ifs can have a destructive effect. My approach to issues like this is that I try to acknowledge certain mistakes in order to enhance future situations/relations. And so in this vein I asked Yi how much was the cats passing away my fault. I know that this is a pointless thing to analyze but I want this topic to occupy my as an element of mourning and was not really sure what else would I want to know about the situation. I did not in any way expect a soothing answer which I also stated in the question. The answer was 11.1 > 46 . I do not really get where this is supposed to take me.
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