Assistance sought for a major life decision!
I have been living outside the US since the mid-1970s, and am now 65. In the last year or so I have become widowed, and also lost a prized job. At my age, I don't see many work prospects ahead in the small, poor country I live in now, and am becoming increasingly depressed since most of my social life was connected to work, leaving me quite isolated. I have enough savings that I could hang on quite while if I live like a local impoverished widow, and at least maintain my independence. But maybe pride has been getting in my way, because I am certainly not happy in current circumstances. One of the few options I have is returning to the US, where I can live with a rich, conservative and rather judgmental brother who will expect me to take any minimum wage job (I will not be able to get another professional one in this US location), using practically non-existent public transport system even with arthritis. He has always been very harsh with me, but in fact in many ways we actually get along quite well as he is also alone, with a son just about to leave home. I have been, of course, very hesitant about this move, fearing I might be trapped, or that he might say cruel things. In the past he has mentioned food stamps and homeless housing, and if that is all he thinks I'm worth, I would seriously rather die.
Hex 19 seems to suggest that going to the US is not a bad idea, but that it could be important for me to get the timing right. Does Evil in the Eighth Month suggest I should not put it off, further whittling away at my savings? Or could it mean the opposite, that it would be better to wait longer, until my brother's son has left home?
Moreover, I get the impression that returning to the US need not necessarily mean a permanent state of affairs, only a good idea for the present. I take this from Hex 24, Returning, which suggests I don't approach this as a nerve-wracking life decision, which might put too much stress on both of us, but approach it as a temporary solution and figure out over time if it can work out.
I would very much appreciate some friendly input here, as I am inclined to see negatives, though this is far from a negative reading. I am just very afraid to make the jump! Thank you!
I have been living outside the US since the mid-1970s, and am now 65. In the last year or so I have become widowed, and also lost a prized job. At my age, I don't see many work prospects ahead in the small, poor country I live in now, and am becoming increasingly depressed since most of my social life was connected to work, leaving me quite isolated. I have enough savings that I could hang on quite while if I live like a local impoverished widow, and at least maintain my independence. But maybe pride has been getting in my way, because I am certainly not happy in current circumstances. One of the few options I have is returning to the US, where I can live with a rich, conservative and rather judgmental brother who will expect me to take any minimum wage job (I will not be able to get another professional one in this US location), using practically non-existent public transport system even with arthritis. He has always been very harsh with me, but in fact in many ways we actually get along quite well as he is also alone, with a son just about to leave home. I have been, of course, very hesitant about this move, fearing I might be trapped, or that he might say cruel things. In the past he has mentioned food stamps and homeless housing, and if that is all he thinks I'm worth, I would seriously rather die.
Hex 19 seems to suggest that going to the US is not a bad idea, but that it could be important for me to get the timing right. Does Evil in the Eighth Month suggest I should not put it off, further whittling away at my savings? Or could it mean the opposite, that it would be better to wait longer, until my brother's son has left home?
Moreover, I get the impression that returning to the US need not necessarily mean a permanent state of affairs, only a good idea for the present. I take this from Hex 24, Returning, which suggests I don't approach this as a nerve-wracking life decision, which might put too much stress on both of us, but approach it as a temporary solution and figure out over time if it can work out.
I would very much appreciate some friendly input here, as I am inclined to see negatives, though this is far from a negative reading. I am just very afraid to make the jump! Thank you!